The release does not happen overnight; it takes work. This work involves peeling back the layers, and layers of hurt. This takes time and courage to face and identify your individual pain. It is a slow process and takes patience. Some reasons why letting go does not happen all at once include:
- Nobody else knows what you have been through. We work to process exactly how we feel, why we feel it, how difficult it is and acknowledging all that energy it took to hide your feelings and buck up.
- Abandonment hurts. As children, we are extremely dependent on others for our survival. When one parent dies, and the other is unavailable, our world as we knew it shatters. We are left to trust that all will be well and work out. The feelings of helplessness cycle and must dealt with at each turn. This takes time.
- Insecurity. During our growth and development, it is normal to feel unsure, vulnerable, and insecure. Life is unpredictable, and disruptions can shake our very core of being. We are masters of self-defense mechanisms to deal with the feelings of fear, anxiety, and sadness. Recognizing and releasing takes time.
- Fear of being alone. Many people will bear mistreatment, disregard, neglect, and abuse rather than learn to adapt to fear and aloneness. This unevenness takes time to see, create a support system, and be able to move on.
- Fear of failure. Failure is a normal part of growth and development. Our society domesticates us into thinking it is bad or wrong. False Evidence Appearing Real is only one piece of the puzzle we must unravel.
The experience of emotions can be positive, negative, healing, destructive, pleasurable, or discontent, depending on how the recording is made in our memories and perceptional field. Being able to regulate how we feel or react to certain events or experiences is not an easy task. One needs to be mentally strong to act contrarily from a situation that his/ her consciousness perceives to be a threat.